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Toilet training advice required please [Sep. 4th, 2007|09:30 am]
UK Parents


I'm wondering if anyone has any advice about the transition from potty to toilet for girls??

When I trained my son, it was so easy to get him to use the toilet (he actually preferred it to the potty right from the start) because he could just stand up to pee.

My daughter has just learned (2 yrs 6 mths) to stay dry during the day but we're struggling to get her to use a toilet and unfortunately her pre-school won't use potties - they have adult-sized toilets with a step and toilet seat! I have voiced my dissatisfaction at this of course but that's the way it is apparently!

Anyway, anyone got any thoughts/ideas/experiences to share?? We're worried that the necessity for using a toilet is going to undo all the hard work that has gone into getting her dry!

Also - has anyone else had a child go dry at night as soon as they've been potty trained? I know of a few children locally (all girls interestingly) who have done this and I remember thinking it was pretty amazing at the time! My daughter has had dry pull-ups every morning since she was dry during the day and we're hoping that this means she's learned to control her bladder whilst asleep! Perhaps because she was toilet trained a bit older?? It hasn't been long (just under a week) but it has been consistent! Here's hoping! Her brother who is almost 4 toilet trained at 2 yrs 4 mths and is still not dry at night!

[User Picture]From: classy_bird
2007-09-04 09:41 am (UTC)
My son was dry day and night after the first week too, I was surprised as I was expecting to have to use pull up or something for a while after he was dry during the day.

I'm not really sure what to suggest about the pre-school, maybe when she see's all the other kids using them she'll be ok ?

My daughter is 2 years and 10 months and is still point blank refusing to use a potty or a toilet, of course just to be awkward she's refusing to wear nappies or pants as well :(
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[User Picture]From: conphie
2007-09-04 09:45 am (UTC)
ahh that's a relief to hear of another stubborn little girl! Everyone told me that girls were easier ... but no way in this case!

It's good to hear about other children who did the dry day and night thing too as I thought it was a complete fluke when my neighbour told me her daughter was dry at night as soon as she became dry in the day ... then another mum told me her daughter was the same! Here's hoping that Sophie is going to be dry at night all by herself as we've tried Connor and have had mixed success. The night time changes of bedding/pyjamas is exhausting work!
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[User Picture]From: seren
2007-09-04 11:46 am (UTC)
I was convinced that Lucy wouldn't like using proper toilets when she was first trained. I bought a portable potty and until then I took a carrier bag full of normal potty, loo roll, dettol wipes etc everywhere with me.. but she was fine about using the adult loo as long as she had a toddler seat/someone to hold her on. She even used a portloo twice when we went for a day out in the first week - no worries at all! They use toilets at her pre-school too.
Mind you, she will always choose the potty at home if given a choice, and she's been dry for 5 months. I should get rid of that thing soon really but she always seems to demand a wee or a poo at mealtimes and I can't leave Millie unattended with her food :/ Wish we had a downstairs loo. I'm going to get a new loo seat with built in toddler seat in the hope that she can get herself onto it.. the cheapo plastic seat we have now is useless and just slips away from under her when she tries to get on.
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[User Picture]From: conphie
2007-09-04 01:29 pm (UTC)
My friend has one of those loo seats with the built-in toddler seat and they're great!!!

If Sophie was able to climb on and off the toilet herself, we'd just let her go up by herself as she goes up and down the stairs herself anyway so I've never really had that problem, luckily. I have to say that a downstairs loo would be a luxury for toilet training and I'm envious whenever I go to friends houses and the kids can just nip to their downstairs loos!

Connor was always fine with toilets too - I just thought that was about being a boy and not having to actually sit on it to pee.

Although Sophie is 2.5, our pre-school takes kids from 2 and I think it's a bit much to expect little ones who are just learning to potty train to learn to use a big grown up toilet too. Or maybe that's just me?? It's a big step to go from sitting down on a potty to actually getting to a toilet, getting a step and seat out and climbing on IN TIME don't you think?

I guess I'll just have to see how she gets on there!
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[User Picture]From: seren
2007-09-04 05:43 pm (UTC)
Glad to hear the seats are good. They look good but I'm yet to find someone that has one. I figure it will get lots of use with two little girls :)

Lucy can't get on & off the loo by herself so I always have to go up there with her which is a big pain with Millie around. She goes up and down the stairs by herself too, we haven't had a stairgate for over a year, although I think I will be setting one up again pretty soon for Millie :|

Do they definitely have to get the step and seat for themselves and climb on without any help?! If so that's absurd. If a member of staff is taking them then I guess it's alright but I do think they should have a potty hanging around if one is requested because it's not their place to tell you how to potty train!
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[User Picture]From: lackofgravitas
2007-09-04 05:09 pm (UTC)
I think kids are better at coping with new stuff when there's no choice, rather than when they perceive their parents are just being bloody-minded about something. You might find that if you let Sophie carry on using the potty at home without comment, but when she's at pre-school there's no choice but to use the toilet, that she'll be absolutely fine, whereas if you 'artificially' insist on the toilet at home she'll rebel.

We only got N to use the toilet consistently at home when we had no water for nearly two weeks and absolutely refused to waste what little we had swilling out a potty! She did have a half-hearted attempt at regressing to the potty once the water came back, and still regards it as a huge treat to be able to use the potty in her bedroom at bedtime!

Oddly, N seemed to produce dry night-time nappies for a couple of weeks after she was dry in the day, but went back to sopping wet ones after that, only becoming dry enough to 'risk' without a nappy a few weeks ago.

I have a friend whose youngest was dry at night before her eldest - two years apart, and the youngest was a boy, so goes against received wisdom. She reckons it was him being dry at night that kicked her daughter into touch, she was dry at night very shortly afterwards!
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